It is Saturday morning, about 5am. I couldn’t sleep…so I’ll write. Then maybe I’ll be able to sleep. I had a really good reason for cheating on my husband 2 days ago, beginning with getting hit on the head with a stick by the guy I cheated with. The college student was actually playing catch with his dog and I got in the way or he didn’t see me. I was looking at the trees. They were glinting with a golden light from the sun setting behind them and I was thinking about my sister, Meliah. She used to pull back her soft, dark blonde curls in a low ponytail. She was getting a few wrinkles around her mouth and laugh lines by her hazel eyes. This time last year, only a few days before her accident, Meliah and I went on a walk together down my street. She was excited with her pregnancy and we slowly walked past all the college kid’s houses and I told her how strange it was to be the mom with the little one and the husband on the college party street. We brought her dog, Lika on our walk, and now as I pictured her laughing and grumping about her work, tugging Lika back on her hot pink leash, I was aching for her. I looked carefully at the golden trees, wondering if she was somehow a part of them, then I heard a dog bark. My heart flipped as it sounded exactly like Lika. Then I felt the whack on my head. It is pretty crazy what happened next but I have to tell you this person was the kind of good looking that you see in magazines or in movies. The kind that you don’t even think exists outside of grocery-store tabloid pics. His name is Jake and he seems to have some sort of a crush me. I know it sounds crazy and I don’t know why he does. I’m probably some sick bet with his friends, the mom down the street. I don’t know. I won’t say exactly what happened, except that it wasn’t much…but it was something and I’m totally excited and utterly horrified at the same time. I’m not sure how to handle it, but to feel something besides pain and anxiety in my heart is like a dream come true…a temporary one. I should probably write what happened…but the little one is waking up right now. But I will.