This is what Jake’s alarm clock looks like:
So I went in Jake’s house with him and one thing lead to another. I wrote a detailed post about it here for tomorrow. It is a little too racy to just publish so it is password protected. The password is, mistake.
To come clean and tell Chris what happened would liberate me from this enormous lie on my shoulders. But it would destroy us and we need to stay together for Zoe, especially now that her evaluation is coming up tomorrow.
I can’t believe I added some thing to the terrible list of regrets. But honestly, it is such a different kind of regret from loosing Meliah. Through this idiocy and betrayal, I realized that I am human again. I felt like I was just so blah, a waste of space. Now I realize and remember that I can be amazing…but horrible. Maybe I will call my younger sister, Astrid, in Brooklyn. I need to talk to a girl.