Odette goes jogging just about every evening. She usually looks at my house as she passes by. I wonder what she is thinking about when she looks over here. I see her clearly from my living room and Milo barks when she gets close. I always want to go out and join her so today I had my sneakers on ready and when she jogged on by I went out there too.
I followed from pretty far behind. She went up to the main road and across to the football stadium. I had a feeling she would climb to the top, she is that type of person. I was right of course, and while she was gazing at the sky I walked up there and sat down next to her on the silver chair. She beamed at me and the stadium spread out in front of us.
“I think about you when I come here and now here you are,” she said.
“I think about you all the time.” I took her hand. I could feel her wedding ring. I wanted to take it off and throw it into the field.
“I found a kitten in front of my house this morning,” she said. “It was sick I could tell it was about to die. So I took it to the emergency vet. It is going to cost $1000 to make her better.”
“What?” I laughed at the ridiculousness. I almost joked that she should have stomped on its head but thought better of it.
“They are going to do the first blood transfusion today and they have to regulate her temperature and get rid of the fleas and the parasites.”
“Is she going to be OK?”
“Yeah, after doing all that stuff to save her. They have cats that live at the vet’s office and they use their blood for transfusions.”
“Well that’s handy” I said. I didn’t care about her kitten. I looked over the stadium wall and the tops of the buildings across town were starting to turn gold from the setting sun.
“You know we have no future together” she said.
I felt that yearning in my stomach. I don’t like that feeling. There isn’t much that I want in life. Actually, that’s not true, I want everything. But there is something about this girl, this odd, odd girl who seems to be from right out of a childhood fairytale and plunked into a world she can’t navigate properly…into a world where she can’t be the heroine or the princess, just a quiet villain. She’s got amazing legs too. I ran my finger down her leg and smiled when I saw the goosebumps.
“Come back home with me” I said.
“I’m so tired of the betrayal” she said and she started to cry. I’ve never seen her cry before. I don’t usually like it when girls cry, its annoying. But I didn’t mind this.
“I’m too scared to leave him. I decided to because he deserves better but I’m so scared.”
“Don’t be scared of being alone because you’re not alone” I said.
“I know” she said. “I have Zoe.”
That wasn’t really what I meant but, OK.
She shook her head and looked up at the expansive blue sky. I looked towards where she was staring. The clouds were starting to look like pink cotton candy. She said, “I can’t decide what is worse…the soul sucking acceptance of mediocrity over love, or the betrayal. I should have left him first, because then he would have been rejected, and not betrayed. Rejection is so much better than betrayal.”
I wiped her tears away with the bottom of my T-shirt, hoping she’d see my abs.
“I come here to think” she said. “So excuse me if you have to bear witness to that.”
This was a good place to think. Something about finding a summer evening breeze clears the mind. I needed to do some serious thinking too, about how to get this Chris guy out of the picture. He was ruining everything. First things first though…how was I going to get her back to my place before jogging on home?